Uncontrollable change in our life can hit us out of the blue like a semi truck and sometimes those changes can be really painful and life changing. Life changes that are sudden and unplanned are much more difficult to handle and will definitely cause more stress than planned changes that we can prepare ourselves for. One way to manage these types of uncontrollable change in our lives is to find ways to limit them as much as possible. We can do this by living a healthy lifestyle, staying focused on our plans and goals and by having the self control to make good choices. Hopefully this will at least limit some of the unexpected and painful changes that can occur due to our decisions. The truth is we can never truly get away from change in our life all together and in fact some small change happening regularly in our life can be a good thing.
Find the positive in hard times, there is usually something good to focus on
When things inevitably happen that I didn’t plan, I try to find the good in it and try to find a positive aspect of the change. Then I can try to focus on that to help take the sting out of the change. Like when I got an MRI for intense back pain that was not going away and found out I had some disc problems in my spine that might require surgery. The situation sucks and the pain that continues to plague me sucks but hey, at least the MRI didn’t find a tumor anywhere that I didn’t know about. I have a clean torso and there wasn’t anything hiding that I didn’t know about.
The positive you can find may be just the fact that you are still breathing!
I realize of course that some of the change we go through doesn’t have any way to put a positive spin on it and that’s a truth we can’t escape. If you lose a loved one or someone else makes a choice that negatively affects you in a way you had no choice over, there is not much positive in those situations. Please keep in mind that even through the tough ones that we are still breathing and our heart is still beating and that there is still hope because of that. We can make it through to the other side of whatever is happening, just don’t lose hope or focus.
The good habits you build into your life help you overcome the times of struggle
Often times the positive habits, self control, healthy lifestyle and healthy community you have hopefully cultivated in your life can help you to get through those times of grief and painful uncontrollable change. If you are struggling with any of these areas I have covered many of them in previous posts and I really encourage you to dig in and hopefully find some new tips and tricks in your life to be successful in these areas.
Don’t make big changes in overly stressful times when you aren’t thinking straight!
It’s definitely important to note that I don’t think you should make any drastic changes in your life in a period of grief or in a time where you recently went through some painful change in your life . Save those changes for when things smooth out and you are thinking straight and clear. Then you can start to plan and make changes, not when you are hurting and struggling so badly you can’t think straight!
Don’t just give in to the problem or bad feelings, spend time working through how to make it positive
After trying to focus on the positive in whatever change you are going through do a little brainstorming on how you can use this change for good, or how it might benefit yourself and those important to you. There might be a way, there might be a benefit in the change even if it is a hard one. You are smart, I know you can figure something out so give it a try.
We need to remember that life is filled with uncontrollable change that never ends so we have to create strategies to help us cope and overcome or we run the risk of becoming ineffective and bogged down in our troubles quickly.
Look at your life from a thousand miles up…there will always be something good to see
So think the change through, get outside of your situation and look at it from a high up view. What is positive about it and how can you or those around you benefit from it. I bet if you really think about it and do some good brainstorming you can figure things out and maybe come out the other side with a smile. It might take a while but I know it’s possible. Let me know if you need any help, I’m here for you!