Now here is something that is really lacking in a lot of us today. We make decisions and if the results of that decosion are good then we are happy and loud about i8 t! However when our decisions lead to bad outcomes so often we begin to play the blame game. We go down the list of people to blame for something that we decided on ourselves. My parents never taught me that well enough, I never learned that in school, the other person was at fault, there was ice on the road, the sun was in my eyes…on and on the blame game can go until there is no blame left for the person that needs to learn from it, ourselves!
You Have To Allow Yourself To Learn From Your Mistakes
Without owning our decisions and the consequences that come with those decisions we do not allow ourselves to learn from our mistakes. When we blame others we do not let our brains fully grasp what happened because of the decision we made. So we short circuit the learning curve and there is a good chance whatever mistake we made will be made again and again, until we finally own up and learn from our mistakes. Natural consequences are some of the most powerful learning tools that we can experience and when you do not let them run their course, you are going to continue to struggle with that life lesson until you finally own the results of your decisions.
We Need The Consequences To Teach Us What Not To Do
As a parent if I did not let my children struggle with the natural consequences of many of their actions I would not be doing my duty and not be helping them learn natural life lessons. They need to scrape their knees and bump themselves from time to time to learn their limitations and learn how to successfully navigate in this crazy world. I would argue that adults need that too. The difficult thing is that as adults our decisions can lead to a lot more painful consequences than a skinned knee or a little bruise here and there. In the end it is well worth feeling the pain to gain the education of experience.
Passing The Blame Short Circuits The Natural Learning Process
However, when we pass blame and do not accept the natural consequences of our own actions as our fault we do not allow the learning that comes with those consequences. You made the choice, no one else did, own your decisions and the consequences that come with them and even if they are painful hopefully you can learn from them and not have to experience that pain anymore. After all no one wants unnecessary pain in their lives…we have enough to deal with as it is!